I recently had a question asked to me in regards to why feeling inadequate at church is so painful? It struck me as a really powerful thought.
I found my answer to be something to this nature... We are taught that church is the place where are short comings don't matter. And they don't... until they do.
I had to think on it. I've struggled in church a few times. I've been through all the emotions from anger to despair. I've felt invisible among a sea of faces that were supposed to be my spiritual family. I've felt like I was in some way betraying my faith due to the anger I felt. I've hit my knees hard to try to discern where I was messing up. I learned. I railed. I cried. I grew.
Where I am now is a place that was forged through thoughtful consideration and prayer. I don't always agree with direction my church takes, but I'm okay with not agreeing. I'm okay with questioning and I'm fully aware that the body of a church is made up of people who are not perfect. They make mistakes just like me and, yes... you guessed it...
I'm okay with that.
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